Winning over a girl on a date doesn’t rely on sweet talk or material accumulation, but on your sincerity and sense of proportion throughout the process – making her feel your sincerity, interest and thoughtfulness in getting along, and changing from “having a little affection” to “wanting to have a next time with you”. This kind of “taking over” is not coercion, but rather making her willingly open her heart to you and even actively look forward to the next meeting. The following methods can help you win her heart on the first date.
First, do your homework thoroughly before a date to make her feel that “you are very attentive.”
The success or failure of a first date lies half in preparation. Don’t wait until you meet to ask “Where do you want to go?” Getting to know her preferences in advance can make her feel valued by you as soon as you meet her. For instance, if she always posts pictures of art exhibitions on her Moments, I would invite her to an art gallery. When we meet, I would say, “Seeing that you like Impressionism and there happens to be a special exhibition of Monet here, I thought you might be interested.” She mentioned that she “likes quiet places”, so she avoided noisy shopping malls and chose a cafe with window seats, saying, “The light here is good and you can also see the street view. It shouldn’t make you feel bored.” Preparations in details can add more points: Check the route in advance and tell her, “It’s most convenient to take Line 3 from your home. I’ll pick you up at the subway exit.” If it’s cold, bring a spare coat. When you meet, naturally say, “I’m afraid you’ll get cold on the way. Take this one first.” I even remember that she didn’t eat coriander. When ordering, she voluntarily told the waiter, “Don’t put coriander in these dishes.” These preparations made in advance are more convincing than saying “I like you” when we meet. They will make her feel that “he takes my words to heart”. In fact, if you want to win over a girl, as long as you are good at chatting, you have an 80% chance of winning her over. Because the core of a romantic relationship is all about the word “talk”. Talk to a girl about life, about your heart, and about the future. Only when you can get along well with her will there be a chance for development.
Second, when meeting, “show a sense of relaxation” and don’t let nervousness ruin the atmosphere
Many people are too eager to show off on a date, and as a result, they either talk non-stop or are so reserved that they can’t say a word. In fact, girls prefer a “natural and unforced” state. Your relaxation will make her relax as well. When meeting, smiling and saying, “Your outfit suits you well today. I recognized you at the intersection just now,” is more intimate than simply saying “Hello.” When chatting, don’t always think about “what to say right”. Casually share some small things that happened on the way, such as “Just now when I was taking a taxi, I met a driver who talked to me all the way about growing flowers. He said that green lilies need to be soaked in beer to grow well. Have you tried it?” Don’t panic when there’s an awkward silence. Just smile and say, “My mind suddenly went blank just now. What do you usually think about when you’re daydreaming?” On the contrary, it seems real. Remember, you are here to “chat” with her, not to “take an exam”. Occasional little awkwardness is more endearing than forcing a performance. When you can naturally joke around with her and share embarrassing stories, she will feel “comfortable getting along with this person”, and comfort is the prerequisite for developing a good impression of her.
Third, in the interaction, “grasp her emotions accurately” to make the chat smooth and continuous
Chatting is not about you talking and I listening, but about being able to catch the other person’s words and even help her delve deeper into the topic. For instance, when she talks about “recently learning baking”, don’t say “Amazing!” instead, you can say “I always feel like making a cake is like conducting a chemistry experiment. It doesn’t work if there’s a little more or less of the ingredients. Did you feel extremely frustrated when you failed for the first time?” Encourage her to speak more by asking questions, and then share your feelings, making the conversation as back-and-forth as playing badminton. When she talked about happy things, you laughed along and even exaggeratedly said, “Really?” This is just too lucky. Come on, let’s talk about the details. When she talks about her troubles, she should empathize first and then respond. For instance, “It’s really annoying that the boss keeps changing plans. If it were me, I might secretly draw a little person on the draft paper to scold him.” This kind of interaction that “follows her mood” will make her feel that “he understands me”, and the feeling of being understood is the easiest way to draw closer. When chatting, look into her eyes more often and nod your head from time to time to let her know that you are listening attentively. This kind of concentration is more effective than saying any sweet words.
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